


My best friend’s sodden seduction technique

by Sharing_a_room_with_an_open_fire



Series: How to lose a straight enemy in 10 easy steps [2]
Category: Carry On Series - Rainbow Rowell, Simon Snow & Related Fandoms
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Birdman - Freeform, Carry On Countdown (Simon Snow), Confessions, Crushes, Falling In Love, First Kiss, Flirting, Fluff, Fluff and Humor, Getting Together, Gift Fic, Holding Hands, Horny Horns, Humor, Inappropriate Humor, M/M, Mentioned Tyrannus Basilton "Baz" Pitch, Mutual Pining, Oblivious Dev, Or was it Batman, POV First Person, POV Niall, Prompt Fic, Sexual Fantasy, Sexual Tension, Watford Eighth Year, deNiall
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-28
Updated: 2020-11-28
Packaged: 2021-03-09 21:36:21
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,431
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27722923
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sharing_a_room_with_an_open_fire/pseuds/Sharing_a_room_with_an_open_fire
Summary: [Explicit] 18+ Niall and Dev.Set Watford 8th year. Niall has feelings for Dev and has been leaving not so subtle hints. However, Dev is as oblivious as they come.Niall is desperate enough to give one of Baz’s seduction techniques a try. Will it work?Set within the timeline ofHow to lose a straight enemy in 10 easy steps.COC 2020 Day 4, NOV 28: Side characters.Inappropriate humour and behaviour.
Relationships: Dev/Niall (Simon Snow), Niall & Tyrannus Basilton "Baz" Pitch, Tyrannus Basilton "Baz" Pitch/Simon Snow
Series: How to lose a straight enemy in 10 easy steps [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2027746
Comments: 16
Kudos: 44
Collections: Carry On Countdown 2020





	My best friend’s sodden seduction technique

**Author's Note:**

  * For [forgot_my_holy_water](https://archiveofourown.org/users/forgot_my_holy_water/gifts).



> Dear reader, I hope you will enjoy this silly ficlet.💙 Set within the timeline of **[How to lose a straight enemy in 10 easy steps](https://archiveofourown.org/works/23157277/chapters/55423396)**.  
>   
>  **forgot_my_holy_water** , this is for you. 🥺🥺🥺 You’re so lovely. 💙💙💙
> 
> * * *
> 
> As always so many thanks and love to my amazing friends and betas Blue ([mybluebucketofsnow](https://archiveofourown.org/users/mybluebucketofsnow/pseuds/mybluebucketofsnow)), [shushu_yaoi_lj (llamapyjamas)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/shushu_yaoi_lj/pseuds/shushu_yaoi_lj) and [Theawkwardbibliophile](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Theawkwardbibliophile/works).  
>   
> Thank you for all the help and support with this COC and everything I write and for being awesome friends. 💙
> 
> * * *

# NIALL

I’ve honestly had enough with Baz’s attempts at getting Snow’s attention. He keeps dragging me into every single scheme he’s cooked up and it’s getting absolutely out of control at a rapid speed.

Why can’t Baz understand that he has Snow’s full attention and had it since they met? (It’s more of an obsession really.)

If I sound bitter, I do not mean it. I want to be there for my best friend. 

However, recently I’ve been preoccupied with my own love-life. I don’t mean my usual dating. No, this is _much worse_ and _more serious_ than that.

Truth be told, I’ve recently come to the realisation that I fancy Dev. More than fancy. _I’m in love with him._ (That’s a first for me and I am both nervous and overwhelmed.)

And I’ve tried to make a couple of moves over the last few months, but to no avail. Dev is possibly just as _thick_ as Simon Snow.

For example, I’ve tried to ask him out to the movies last weekend. But he dragged several loud friends with him, one of whom was unabashedly flirting with me the whole evening.

I've never had this much difficulty courting someone before. 

And so to my eternal shame I decide to take a page out of my best friend’s _sodden seduction techniques_ he uses on Snow.

“Oh, you’re still here,” Dev says surprised, entering our room. “I thought you’d be going to your grandmother early.”

“I decided to stay a while longer.” 

I am being vague on purpose. If I end up embarrassing myself in front of Dev, I will escape to London immediately and spend the whole weekend at Nan’s, licking my wounds and snogging anyone available at the local pub.

“Brilliant, fancy a game of chess?” Dev asks.

“Yes, gladly,” I answer and inconspicuously pick up my pen from the table.

Then I silently apologize to my Irish ancestors, (who most definitely would be turning in their graves at this ridiculous, shameful behaviour) and _drop_ the pen.

“Oh no,” I exclaim and try to sound normal. “I dropped my favourite pen.”

I feel like a complete moron and I'm a tad anxious too. So I curl my tongue until I feel the ball of my piercing touch the gums of the inside of my mouth, to soothe my nerves.

“The one with Birdman?” Dev asks and it’s a struggle not to roll my eyes.

“Batman,” I correct without snapping at him. 

I have bigger things to worry about.

After taking one deep breath, I sink to my knees.

“What are you doing?” Dev asks.

“Maybe I could see the pen better from this vantage point,” I answer, as I turn my head towards Dev and lock eyes with him. “While I’m on my knees.”

“Oh yeah. Good idea,” is all I get for my effort, as I watch Dev rummaging through the chess set. 

I’m not done.

_You can do this Niall. For Crowley’s sake, who cares this behaviour is below you, if it gets you the bloke in the end._

I position myself on all fours. I’m not Baz though. I haven’t spelled my jeans a size too small. But they are rather snug.

 _Alright, do it, Niall_ , I try to pep myself, wondering if I may very well simply be making a fool of myself.

I start moving on all fours, like a mad man, regretting this already.

It’s embarrassing and undignified. Crowley, it’s only been less than a minute and I’ve already had enough.

I may have gained a better respect for Basil. He’s putting himself through the most embarrassing situations all in the name of love. 

One thing I am sure of now — it takes a strong and determined will to manage _all that_.

Unfortunately, it seems that getting any interest out of Dev isn’t in the cards for me. My Irish luck, I suppose.

I am just about to get up when I hear a loud pang. I tilt my head and see Dev standing there, staring at me; the chessboard and all the pieces are lying haphazardly on the floor. 

Of course I don't know without a shadow of a doubt if this reaction _is_ in fact connected to me crawling around the room on all fours, (practically inviting him to fuck me right here right now.)

My doubt notwithstanding, I see a clear bulge in Dev’s trousers. He must be at the very least semi hard. 

This is the moment of truth. I could take the cowardly way out and pretend this never happened. 

Or I can take the bull by its horns — extremely _horny_ horns as it seems. (Unlike my best friend, I don’t mind to gamble once or twice.)

“Like what you see?” I ask, trying not to show how nervous I am.

Dev flushes scarlet and swallows. His eyes, however, lock with mine and I might have this in the bag after all.

 _I’ve got you now,_ I think. _Thank fucking snakes._

“Are you pulling my leg?” he asks with a shaky breath. 

I get up from the floor and walk over to him. Dev doesn’t step away, even though we’re mere inches apart.

“I am not,” I answer softly. “I fancy you, Dev, more than fancy.”

“No you don’t,” he argues. “I’d know.”

Great snakes. I do my damndest not to laugh right into his face or sneer at him.

“I’ve been leaving not too subtle hints for months,” I say and glance down at his bulge, wondering how his cock looks like, how it’d feel to the touch. 

My eyes come up to him. He’s so beautiful, his green eyes are piercing right through me. I’ve spent years getting lost in them, not realising what it all meant.

I want to kiss Dev and then I want to sink to my knees again, unzip the flies on his trousers and claim his cock as _mine_. 

I’ve dated plenty but I’ve never felt this — the need to have someone all to myself and to never let that person go.

“Come off it,” he mumbles, his cheeks flushed.

“I’m completely serious.”

“Since when?” Dev asks, his Adam’s apple bobs as he swallows again and licks his lips.

“Since I haven’t seen you for two bloody months that I spent in America over the summer break.” 

“So you were bored?” he asks and something flashes behind his eyes. _Doubt_.

“No. I mean yes, I _was_ bored but I also missed you and couldn’t stop thinking about you,” I admit. “Everything between us took on a new meaning for me.”

But Dev doesn’t seem convinced. I suppose it’s time to give full honesty a try. I swallow nervously myself.

“I’ve spent two months wanking while thinking about you and _only you_ ,” I say and then add, “and I am positive that I’ve done it before, without realising — _for years._ ”

Dev smiles then and it takes my breath away. I’ve never been in such close proximity to him, to be able to see his smile in all its intricate details or the fact that I could count his lashes if I wanted to. (I don’t. I’m not insane.)

“I’ve wanted you too — for years,” he finally speaks and cups my cheek, tracing it with his thumb. 

“You never said anything.”

“I didn’t think you felt the same. When you kissed Gareth in fifth year instead of me, I thought it meant you didn’t fancy me.”

“It was spin the bottle, Dev,” I chuckle, and reach for his hand. “They didn’t give me a choice.”

“I thought it was rigged,” he exclaims and makes a face.

I wish it was. I have a vague memory of looking at Dev that evening, at his lips, thinking I wanted to kiss him. And later decided it must be because he was my best friend and not really realising what I was actually feeling. 

“No, Bunce spelled it against rigging,” I say and continue more quiet, “I wish she didn’t do it.”

“Oh,” is all Dev says.

Except it comes out breathless. I am not entirely sure what is happening. But I think we are finally on the right track, where we were supposed to be all along.

Dev’s eyes go lower, towards my lips, when I lick them.

“I’m wondering if I should kiss you now,” I whisper, looking into his eyes.

“You should,” he answers and smiles, “Or _I_ could kiss _you_.”

And he does, locking his lips with mine. Nothing will ever feel the same after today. (I hope he doesn’t mind my Prince Albert.)

  
  
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading. 💙


End file.
